There's something about the way kids talk - especially when they're just learning how - that leaves so much open to interpretation. And just the tiniest bit of mush mouth can throw an entire discussion way off track.
I was enjoying my evening in the office, just relaxing, having a glass of cheap wine. (And if you're a friend of mine on Facebook, you'll know I like me some cheap wine. Although, I can't have all that much anymore. But that's different. Anyway...) Back to the cheap wine.
Because I thought the kids were asleep.
Until this comes running into my office.
She's cute, right? Cute until she's hollering about a duck in the window. You heard me. A duck. In the window. Duck. Window. You get it.
BreMonster: Maaaaaaama! Is duck! In window!
Me: What?
Bre: Duck in window!
Me: There's a duck in your window?
She begins looking at me like I'm a complete idiot.
Bre: Truck. In. Willow.
Me (blinking in confusion): Truck in willow?
Bre (frustrated): Buck. In. Pillow.
At this point, she's frustrated and I'm way confused. Buck in her pillow? Are we talking a male deer? If so, can we make jerky? Or is her pillow now producing one dollar bills? If so, we need to make sure they're real.
Me: There's a buck in your pillow.
Bre: Buck.
Me: Buck. In your pillow.
And then came the voice of reason, the four year old, A-Girl, yells from her room like she's sick of hearing the whole thing:
MOM! It's a BUG. On her PILLOW!
Oh. I'll get this no problem.
Or, if it's to big, I'll get MarvMan.
So I go rushing off to get this bug. On the pillow. Not a duck in a window, a truck in a willow, or a buck in a pillow. But a bug. On a pillow.
I hate bugs.
I get in there, ready to put on the brave face, because I don't think I should transfer my irrational fears onto my daughters, only to be sorely disappointed. And hugely relieved. It wasn't, in fact, a bug.
It was a piece of fuzz.
I think we need to work on enunciation in this household.
LOL. I love this. This is one of the best blogs you've posted in a while. Too cute. :D
ReplyDeleteLMAO that's awesome. Mase has recently learned the work fork. he pronounces it f**k. Sitting in the restaurant one night, eating quietly and Mase says "Oh, NO! Drop f**k, Dad-dad! I want a f**k. F**K, dad. Uh oh, f**k on fwoor. Hewp. Me. Get. F**k."
ReplyDeleteI kid you not. Mike listened and after a pause, turned to me and said " I know he's not saying what it sounds like he's saying"
Mase chose then to say loudly,as a perfect punctuation to the moment - "f**k"
word verification- bablyrat. Pretty sure that is what the kids are speaking. i could just see you preparing yourself to kill the buck-truck-duck-fuzz. Awesome.
ROTFL!! She is precious! Now, I'm afraid to tell you this, but I still come running downstairs, screaming about ducks on the willow....and it turns out to be fluff.
ReplyDeleteI check under my pillow every night for spiders cos they wait for me you know, and this one night, I jumped out of my skin; my husband had drawn a picture of a spider with a little speech bubble saying "Boo!". He's dead now....
Noooo, not my husband...though it was close; the paper spider. I crushed him cos I'm soooo brave....